Are you drowning?

We recently had our fourth child... and all of a sudden I feel like I am drowning... all over again.

You see, I am drowning all the time! I was drowning when my parents divorced, and I was drowning in my last year of high school. I was drowning throughout my entire college career and I was drowning when we planned our destination wedding. I was drowning after our first child was born, a thousand miles away from our families, and I had no idea what I was doing as a new mom.

I was drowning when my husband deployed for the first time, and I was drowning when we found out on R and R (still 3 months away form him being home) that I was pregnant with number two. And when said number two showed up, mere weeks before I finished my thesis on my masters, I was so so close to going under for good.

I almost drowned when I found out I was pregnant with my third and my husband was leaving us for a year again... I have no idea how I survived a 4 year old, 2 year old, and a 6 week old for an entire year... I was drowning and waves crashed over and over again, where at times all I could do was hold on tight and try to survive the pounding.

Now I sit here, barely getting the older two off to school on time,  trying to help my two year old with goldfish while nursing my newborn, and I stare at my disaster of a house, the piles and piles of laundry, the unwashed dishes and hair and I feel like I am drowning all over again.

I don't tell you this for sympathy, because certainly some of your "drowning" stories are far more severe than mine, but I tell you this to show that you can and will survive. By the sheer grace of God, He pulls us through our hardest, most difficult times... and He shows us a beautiful result of our tirelessly treading water, trying desperately not to go under. He shows us what faith and trust in Him will bring.

There are some who will read this and say, I don't feel like I am drowning at all! I hope that is you, I truly do. Those times where I feel like I am swimming laps instead of desperately treading are times worth remembering... and the knowledge I will be there again one day is a wonderful promise I am happy to hold.

But there are some of you that may understand what I am saying... and although I do not know what has you "drowning" today, it may be moving to a new place, or trying to survive a big change. Others may be enduring grief, while some may be fighting off an emotional illness no one knows about... It could be financial or emotional or physical drowning- heck it could be all three!
What is making you feel overwhelmed, insecure, or barely surviving isn't the important piece of the puzzle... What is truly important is the trust and faith in the One that will always see you through to safety, the One who will one day have you swimming laps happily.

If you are drowning, I urge you to take a deep breath, pray to the God who knows your darkest struggles, and hold on to the promise that although the waves may be strong, your anchor is much much stronger.

“We who have fled to take hold of the hope offered to us may be greatly encouraged. We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure” (Hebrews 6:18b, 19a)